To be honest it is a little difficult to write this review, because there isn't a huge amount that actually happens in this film. Our three burglers break into the house, avoid a dog (Chekhov's Dog obviously), then disturb the guy and then for some reason don't just run out of the house immediately and cut their losses. There's some stuff about how the fact that one of them brought a gun to the house means that this is armed robbery and therefore so bad that they can't just leave (why?) and then the plot does branch out when they discover someone else in the house - but still the solution to all this is just to use the fact that you're not blind, turn the lights on, and run the hell out of the house before the old guy has a chance to realise what's happening. Guess what - he ain't going to pick you out of an identity parade! Then call the cops anonymously and send them into his house to deal with the 'plot branch'. Couldn't be easier?!
Not really understanding what RedLetterMedia saw in this. Perhaps they're just trying to big up independent American film-makers as opposed to the huge studios, which is fair enough I guess. Don't Breathe isn't really that bad, it's just a bit too much of the same thing for 90 minutes. Which would still be ok if it wasn't that the thing that's the same couldn't be resolved very easily by just doing all the things I already said.
Anyway, would still rather watch this than the new Alien remake. Ridley Scott has remade one of his own films. And he didn't choose to remake Kingdom of Heaven, you know, one that wasn't very good, make it better and all that. No - he has remade Alien. For. Fuck. Sake.
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